Jekyll and Hyde (First Weekend)

In short, we got through it, though it was rough in places.

Due to various issues beyond our control, our rehearsal time for the whole process was shorter than normal, and tech week itself was also diluted, as I talked about in entries from that time. So in some ways, scary as it was, the first weekend was a bit like extended tech, but with an audience. I've already discussed opening night.

Saturday went much faster. Party because a few of the seams were coming together, and partly because, I would guess, of the slight relief that came with no longer having to open the show. (See previous entry.) It was the night of our smallest audience by numbers, and also the "quietest" though the jokes are few in this show, and that can be hard to judge.

I wish I could say I was without slip ups, but I cannot. I can however say that on Saturday night, and the following matinee, any slip ups I made were minor, easily corrected, and not frequent, as far as I can recall.

I'm not happy about these slip ups. I'm not excusing them. In fact, I'm not sure why I have so many of them in this show so far, (compared to my norm.) The large amount of lines I have, the extra stress with the show, or something else, I can't say. But just as a show has both artistic and tech elements, so too does any given actor's performance. I have been mostly satisfied, even proud of much of the artistic side of my performance as Jekyll so far. It is on my technical side, (clarity, speed, ease of delivery) about which I have been somewhat concerned. Not worried, just concerned.

Some of this has to do with difficulties to work through that would not be necessary but for the choices and attitudes of particular people at particular times. The buck, however, does in the end stop with me, and I could do better from a technical perspective. If I can't obtain perfection, (how often do we on stage??) than I hope to at least improve all aspects of my performance, starting tomorrow, for the second weekend of shows.

I find the second weekend of shows usually goes better than the first anyway, especially Saturday night. (Though this seems somewhat less true over the last few shows I've been in.)

Opening Night: Jekyll and Hyde

It is done. Opening night. Though the final dress not a disaster, it was in many ways a rough night, and as a result, we were unable to run the show front to back as intended for performance.

Which meant opening night itself was the first chance we had to do so.

And did we do so? Yes. But not without some potholes.

I'll say that certain parts of the show have improved each of the last several nights, including opening night. Compared to where we were a week ago, things could have been a lot worse on our first performance in front of an audience. (I'd say about 25 people out of a house of 44.)

I was more nervous, even apprehensive about opening this show than any I have been in for years. There have been more uncertain variables and unexpected problems, (some of them avoidable if not for poor choices by certain people) that I wasn't sure what to expect at times. I felt prepared mentally going into last night's show, but I wasn't at all certain that all of the variables I mentioned would allow me to accomplish everything in my performance as intended.

For the most part, I delivered an acceptable performance. And though certain doubts still hang over elements of this show, which will probably make me more nervous each evening than I otherwise should or would be after opening night, I cannot doubt the great relief of having put our first official performance behind us.

There are just some plays where, silly as it may seem afterward, one wonders if it can be done. One wonders if on the whole the cast can actually deliver a show before a paying audience. With the completion of opening night, we proved in this case that we are capable. This of course doesn't at all mean that every performance of the show for the remainder of the run will be without issues. That's one reason I remain, at least for now, a bit nervous. But what it does mean is that we can do this show. The parts of my subconscious that perhaps wondered if I/We could pull it off at all have at least been quieted. That will make the hours leading into tonight's performance less stressful than last night's.

A few missed entrances for a moment or two were probably some of them ore distracting elements for me. I myself am unlikely to make that particular mistake, because I am almost always on stage, even when my character is not "present" in the scene. I skidded a few times with a word hear and there with my lines, but nothing I am overtly ashamed of.

The biggest issues last night was a door on the set; it broke in the middle of a scene...left hanging on one hinge. It is supposed to be this way at the end of the play, but for one reason or another it broke prematurely. The actress who had stepped through it was flustered in her attempts to fix it. I was flustered because it would throw the scene. As I happened to play Jekyll, and the actress happened to play Jekyll's servant in that moment, I "ordered" the servant to leave the door be, and tell me what she wanted.

Not the greatest possible save, but it was a gaping hole, almost literally in the narrative that had to be addressed somehow, at least until a techie came out and fixed the door. Had it been another scene, I don't think an ad-lib would have been as readily appropriate. So sometimes we must acknowledge that even goofs, if they must happened, can have good or poor timing. That one, if it had to occur, was probably the best timing available.

Otherwise, it was satisfying to me, at last being able to move about as intended. I am hoping we improve overall a bit each night. If we do, the first weekend may act as a sort of extended tech, allowing us to close out next weekend in high fashion.

But long before that, is tonight, and tomorrow afternoon. 

Tech Week(s)

Though only this week has been the official tech week for Jekyll and Hyde (tonight being the final day of same), last week, for various reasons also felt like a tech week. That's one reason I didn't post an update on progress until now.

Nothing would be more boring that to share with you all of the little (and big) issues that have spring up that have slowed our progress in this production. Issues that are for the most part particular to the venue, the time of year and other such things. I will generalize the delay by saying that unexpected absences, unexpected equipment issues, some unwanted interference and an over crowded shared venue have all contributed to a trying final two weeks of the rehearsal process, for just about all involved. Everyone's process is slowed as we repair set pieces and try to get the lighting board to cooperate even now.

That certainly includes me. I am in fact off book for this show, and I have been. But I find I still trip or slide in places. Part of that may be due to how many lines I have in the show. (I believe in this case I have the plurality of them.) Part of the issue is the nature of the lines. Not only are the period for the Victorian era in some ways, in other ways they are not, which can trip my tongue even more. The script is also, in truth, in need of an editing if ever there is a revised edition to same.

On the whole, there is a lot of stress involved in preparing for this production. Stress that has, I think, slowed my own journey toward total confidence in what I am doing.

I must also mention that because I am on stage so much, I do not get a breather as often as the rest of the cast, or as often as I usually do in a show. That also has no doubt contributed to the pressure.

My confidence is in the end, my own journey. I don't think anyone can just tell another person to become confident. They can encourage, and that helps, but the final destination must be reached by the person in question on their own. I am there for parts of the play, but not for every single scene, as I normally am, and strongly prefer to be, by the end of the rehearsal process.

This hopefully doesn't mean I am somehow "losing my touch." The fact is, I don't believe that I am at this time. I've listed all of the complications associated with the show, and in defense of myself, I believe that plenty of people would experience a few speed bumps under the circumstances. Our tech crew, though not responsible for any line delivery is a prime example; this is a show requiring a lot of technical activity, and we have only one true runner, and the stage manager herself. It is a tremendous amount for two people to get done in the time they have to do it. So the strain on optimum performance is by no means restricted to the actors.

I also feel that I have, for whatever reason, been more tense, and rushed on stage while running this show than I normally would be. Whether this can also be attributed to all of the unavoidable extras, I'm not sure. But early last week it dawned on me just how fast I was delivering some of the speeches. Certain emotions of course call for greater speeds, but what I was doing was beyond this. I got to thinking I was going fast for the sake of getting the lines out, as opposed to going fast for the sake of portraying an emotion. I was never given a note that i was too fast, so I don't think I was going fast to the point of being unintelligible. Nevertheless, I tripped on common words more often than I found acceptable, and I made a determination to slow down a bit.

I have in fact slowed my delivery a bit each night since then. Further I have made sure I have physically more relaxed, relieving tension on my actual muscles that I don't always have on stage. This, especially last night, seemed to allow the words to flow more freely. I don't of course want to rid myself of energy on stage, but it has served as a strong reminder to relax. I still made some small errors, but I didn't let that end the world.

It didn't hurt that last night was the first time we ran the show with no "extras" out in the audience. That is to say, only the director and stage manager were there, and the light/sound people were up in the booth. Nobody going in and out.

Tonight then, is the final rehearsal. Because of the nature of my costume, I have actually been wearing mine the entire week, though this is the only official dress rehearsal. I am going to do my very best to treat it as an actual performance. I am off book, I have relaxed a bit, and last night I proved that I am at least in the proper ballpark to do what I need to do. Tonight I want to be sure of it to an even greater degree, though I am aware of the old superstition about the final dress vs. opening night.

Yin and Yang, Spirals and Jekyll.

As the last few rehearsals were similar, I opted for an update on the week, as opposed to nightly as to our progress.

I'll report that I am nearly offbook. I could, with some help, pick may way through every scene but two at this point. Most of Act One is smooth. Its a lot of lines this time. I would prefer to have been off book already, though I am not the only one in the cast who is not. But seeing as how we missed about two weeks potential rehearsal time at the start of the process, and seeing as how I memorize faster when I rehearse, I'd say I'm making progress. If I were this close two weeks ago, (thus making up for the missing two weeks) I'd be fairly happy with myself. Still some work to go, but the end is in sight for lines, I'd say.

Beyond that, I continue to be pleased, and somewhat surprised at how much rich material underneath the text is available for this adaptation. I came to believe that there is in fact an element of Shakespearean or Greek tragedy to the story. What is Hyde, after all, but Jekyll's tragic flaw(s) quite literally personified? At least to a large degree.

In this version, things are less black and white than in many of this tale. Good is at times visible in Hyde, and bad in Jekyll. Yet given that Hyde and Jekyll are essentially as one, you get to the point where you can say that any good you see in Hyde is thanks to Jekyll. And of course any bad you see in Jekyll is thanks to Hyde, which is thanks to Jekyll thanks to Hyde thanks to Jekyll and so on. An infinite spiral emerges, when the plot is viewed in this fashion, the lines of which by the end of this adaptation are more than a bit blurry. Hence the fascination. (If we are doing or jobs well on stage, that is.)

Yin and Yang is another apt visual representation of this script's psychological presentation.

We're forced to ask not only where Jekyll ends and Hyde begins, but whether or not the question itself is a legitimate one. Can we truly determine that there is any line between them? Should we assume that ever there was a thick line between the two? Or are we forced to accept that Hyde both this specific one, and the general concept "Hyde" is kept at bay by less than we'd like to believe? If we conclude this about a character, are we not challenged to conclude it about ourselves?

Consider also the story infers that redemption is possible even for those who we've dismissed as hopeless. And if that is true for Hyde, are we not challenged to consider it is true for real people whom we have dismissed?

I imagine that latter might be more difficult to accept than the former for most people...

Of course, in this adaptation I do not play Edward Hyde, only Henry Jekyll. Four other actors preform Hyde at various times. This conceit has, I believe, allowed me to consider all of the above, and more-considerations I don't think I'd have the time or scope for if I were playing both Jekyll and Hyde. (As actors in this story often do, in other adaptations.) Being Jekyll only is not merely a convenience for costuming. (If you saw how many lines I have you'd know there is plenty of work for me to do despite playing just the one character.) It has also permitting more in-depth considerations and nuance for the character than I might otherwise have had time to explore if I were playing both beings in the time we have in this production. Hence, these thoughts I share with you now.

I've also come to give some speeches near the end in a far more desperate, intense manner. These were always high drama moments, and of course, being off book for them this week made them easier than having my book did. Yet there were certain aspects of the drama leading into it that I just hadn't danced with until this week. They came naturally, though, once the scenes were underway. They could be played other ways, as almost every scene in any play could be. Yet running the whole show every night last week gave me a better notion of what feels best to me. This is different than I had been playing it earlier on, and I am glad the realization for this new option emerged this week.

As for the more literal, physical nature of rehearsals this week, there is improvement over the week before, because we have had more floor space. The set for a previous show, now closed, has been removed, thus allowing us to move about mostly as we will be in the performance. Scene changes are still quite rough, because this show needs a crew of I would say at least five. It has two, with hopefully a third joining at some point. Kudos to who we have working for us at this time for all the frenzied efforts they are putting into a show with huge amounts of scene changes. Even with minimal sets, that's quite a bit to do.

Lights are a huge part of this play, and sadly they were not functioning during what would have been our lighting rehearsal yesterday. Other tech issues were better understood, but it's frustrating to have had no lights. This means we will probably be experiencing them for the first time far later in the the process than is ideal.

Props are still being collected, and I have more to carry with me than anyone else in the show, because I almost never leave the stage. I will feel better when those appear, so I can get used to that.

Costumes are nearly done, though we've not yet worn them to rehearse in.

I'd rather have another week, I won't lie. Yet if we keep at it, and everyone gets off book this week, we'll be fine, I feel.